Stop. Haiku Time!

As printed in Proteus, the Journal of the Delaware Valley Mensa  (Nov 2012)
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       This past October marked the third since JTK, my favorite high school teacher, passed away. As he and I were very fond of haiku, and as he once challenged himself to write 100 of them just for kicks, I thought it a fitting tribute to him to issue my own haiku challenge when his birthday rolled around that first year. Now I have come to associate October with “haiku time” – I solicit topics from friends, hunker down, and the madness begins. But the madness is invigorating, refreshing, and very satisfying. I wonder if JTK is smirking somewhere knowing that, even in the afterlife, he has found a way to assign me English homework.

       As always, I encourage you to join me and JTK in our little Haiku Appreciation Society and try one. Five syllables, seven syllables, five syllables. Pick a topic. Any topic. Or ask a friend to give you one (though you may regret that route – just saying). If you prefer a little more structure, feel free to choose one of the following: newspaper, that song/artist you love, flight, baby elephants, your favorite sweater/chair/X, the color red, crutches, a door, today’s weather. Whatever topic(s) you choose, your brain will smile during the exercise.

       Here are some of mine from this year's challenge.

Gangnam Style
Wearing suit and shades,
grown man does the horsey dance.
Oppan Gangnam Style!

“Where are my glasses?”
“They are on your head, my friend.”
“Thanks. Now, where was I?”

Waving inflatable arm flailing tube men
Well, hello to you!
O-M-G! He’s dead! Oh, wait...
nevermind. He’s fine.

Drill Team
I’m a bit surprised
that my mother let me out
in a skirt that short

Ear Wax
Johnson & Johnson
are rich because we ignore
Q-tip instructions.

How enormous bears
manage to remain this cute
is a mystery

You throw down gauntlets
to make your dramatic points.
I drop microphones.
Sorry, other brands.
Two syllables work better
than “Facial tissue.”
One tenacious square
glinting on a colleague’s nose.
Do I say something?

Poached eggs
Stolen stealthily
from the unsuspecting hen...
ha ha! Now they’re mine!

Michelle, Malia, and Sasha
All so dignified.
All a magnificent brown.
All American.


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